Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Sibling Rivalry

I know I can’t be the only mom out there who has suffered from headaches due to sibling rivalry. There is just something about the high pitched whining sound that causes damage to my poor little head. Luckily, I am able to find comfort in the fact that my girls absolutely, 100% love each other. Although they are bickering like enemies one second, the very next one they are giggling and hugging one another. I’m sure I will never understand sibling rivalry, but perhaps I can find a few ways that will help my girls avoid unnecessary squabbling. Usually, I try to let them figure it out on their own. I feel that this teaches them to communicate with each other (they must do in a calm voice) and to develop problem solving skills. My hope is that if they learn better communication skills, there will be less yelling matches (am I being too hopeful?). I’ve also learned that it does no good to raise your voice at your children when they are fighting. This shows them that when you are angry, raising your voice is the way to communicate. I still reserve my right to yell, but I save it for situations when they are endangering themselves or another.

Every parent needs to discover what is important to their children. My approval is very important to my girls. After discovering this, now I know that I can simply look at them with a sad face and inform them that I am so disappointed in their choices. They immediately stop what they are doing and apologize. The rest of the day they are usually asking me, “Are you proud of me Mommy?” Of course, I’m always a proud mama, but it doesn’t hurt to have them strive to make better choices. Does it? It is very cute to watch two little ones who were just fighting, whispering and working together to make Mommy happy. I know that it is inevitable that siblings will fight, but what do you do to try to create some peace within your household? Grab a latte, put up your feet, and join the discussion!

7 comments:

Redbonegirl97 said...

I usually try to let my boys solve their issues too, until of course I find them rolling on the floor hitting one another, lol.

Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany

Jennifer said...

It's amazing what kids will find to fight about. My kids are 2 and 4 and the older boy somehow needs to have what his sister has (even though I know he's really not interested in that toy) Super frustrating.

On another note, there could be relief in sight and it's called the Pocket Referee. It's a conflict resolution tool for kids. It helps teach them how to work it out on their own. My father and I manufacture this neat new tool and I'd love to participate in a giveaway on your blog if you're interested. Let me know jennifer.vraney@gmail.com

For more information on this magical product The Ref website is: www.thepocketreferee.com

Peace (and quiet)
Jennifer

I♥thesecrazykids said...

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Amanda said...

My kids are still young enough where mid fight I can have them give the other a kiss, lol. Following you now from FMBT

Beth said...

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Happy Tuesday!

What's in a name... said...

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Amy said...

I am still learning. Luckily there isn't a whole lot of sibling rivalry yet. I need to do better about not raising my voice. you are absolutely right about that. But sometimes it is so hard. I really need to work on that. Thanks for the reminder! I hope my kids can be such good friends.